4 Things You Should Stop Saying to Yourself
Negative self-talk is toxic not only to ourselves but also to our relationships, friendships, careers, and overall well-being. Our thoughts hold tremendous power over us. When we stop allowing negative self-talk to dominate our thinking and language, we can start to focus on positive aspects of ourselves and our lives.
The voice inside our heads can be a brutal beast and very finicky. It can be either positive or negative, and unfortunately, negativity often comes more naturally to us. However, these negative thoughts do not exist in a vacuum. They have a way of manifesting themselves in our lives, attracting more negativity and potentially more damning outcomes in our lives.
As I reflected on things I used to say or have heard others say very often, I thought I’d challenge you, my dear Escaper, to stop saying these 4 phrases (although there are MANY more for which I may create a part 2) and what to say instead.
4 Things You Should Stop Saying to Yourself (and what to say instead)
1. I’ll do it next week.
As the saying goes, the pain of discipline is far less than the pain of regret from not taking action. Procrastination only leads to missed opportunities and unfulfilled goals, and “tomorrow” never comes. Instead of making excuses and procrastinating, take charge and accomplish tasks sooner rather than later. Otherwise, you risk finding yourselves in a chaotic and stressful situation down the road.
Tip: If something takes you less time to do right now than writing it down on a task list to do later, do it now!
Instead say…
By doing it now, I give my future self the gift of FREEDOM.
2. I wish I had…
The phrase “I wish I had” implies a sense of regret and a desire to change the past. Repeatedly saying it isn’t good for your mental well-being and hinders your progress in life. When you focus on the past and cry over missed opportunities, you take away the power from the present and future. Not only that, the vibration of that phrase leads to negative emotions such as sadness, frustration, and guilt – all which lead to nowhere.
Instead say…
I’m THANKFUL I have…
3. It’s gotta be perfect.
No, boo, it doesn’t. Thinking everything has to be perfect is a huge mistake. There are just some things you can’t control so trying to be “perfect” will have you on edge and constantly worrying about what could go wrong. Learn to escape the need to be perfect so you can live a happier and more productive life.
Instead say…
I aim for excellence, not perfection and do my BEST at all times.
4. I have to…
The phrase “I have to” may seem harmless at first thought, but it can have a negative impact on your mindset and your approach to tasks. Saying “I have to” implies that you’re obligated to do something, and can create a sense of resentment or resistance towards the task at hand and can have you feeling overwhelmed and burdened by your responsibilities. Ultimately, this leads to a decrease in motivation and productivity and an increase in stress and anxiety, which is what you certainly DON’T want.
Instead say…
I GET to…
Over to you…
Don’t judge yourself harshly if you’ve used the self-critical phrases above. We all have. But now that you’re aware that they pop up for you sometimes, you can choose to immediately reframe those thoughts to a different, more valuable one and instantly raise your vibe when you do!
Which negative phrase resonated with you? What other ones do you use on the regular? Let me know how you combat them in the comments below so we can help each other!
Kesha Brown
Hiya, I'm Kesha. I'm the Head Escaper around these parts ready to help you break some rules, defy expectations, and create that juicytastic, wondermous, happyful life you want and deserve. Follow me on Instagram. Let's hang!
