How to Become a Sexually Empowered Woman (9 Simple Ways)

Sexuality is one of the ways that we become enlightened, actually, because it leads us to self-knowledge.

Alice Walker

Throughout human history, there have been umpteen taboos and judgments around women having sex and their sexuality. From the number of sexual partners to talking openly about sex, women are constantly given labels and criticized under a double standard. The idea that a woman may be sexually empowered and liberated may come with stereotypes, but sexual liberation is crucial and it’s not something we should stay quiet about.

What is Sexual Empowerment?

But first. What the heck is sexual empowerment?

Ask 50 women and you’ll get 50 different answers!

A study conducted by Erchull and Liss (2014) described sexual empowerment as a state that encompasses positive sexual experiences, a sense of security and positivity about one’s sexuality, the ability to articulate desires and set boundaries, and deriving pleasure from sexual encounters. In simpler terms, sexual empowerment is all about feeling at ease, self-assured, and fulfilled in your sexual life.

Sexual empowerment can be both subjective and objective. It’s about feeling empowered and also having the ability to exercise that empowerment in real-world situations.

Is Sexual Empowerment Important?

Ummm, yes!

Navigating through the tangled web of sexual norms can be quite a challenge for women who are eager to discover and reclaim their own sensual prowess. It’s a journey that requires a hefty dose of bravery, no doubt about it.

Expressing one’s sexuality is a fundamental part of our identity and plays a crucial role in our overall well-being. After centuries of sexual exploitation, oppression, and violence, women are now, more than ever, stepping up to reclaim their sexual power.

Sexual empowerment benefits us all for a multitude of reasons – self-confidence, creating healthy relationships, personal well-being, personal autonomy, and self-worth to name a few.

How to Become a Sexually Empowered Woman

A sexually empowered woman is a force to be reckoned with. She owns her desires, knows her worth, and isn’t afraid to go after what she wants.

Unknown

I want that we ALL are comfortable with ourselves so that it doesn’t matter (as much) how others feel nor what they think. To be sexually empowered means educating yourself, healing yourself, and allowing yourself to be free from fear of judgment.

While the road to sexual empowerment can be a life-long journey, it can also be a period of growth and self-love. Here are 9 simple tips to help you on the road to your sexual empowerment.

1. Explore your sexuality – In order to own your sexuality, you must first explore it. The best way to figure out your sexuality is to do some self-exploration. This will allow you to determine what your unique preferences and desires are, and just as equally as important – what experiences and characteristics you don’t want in your sex life. A better self-understanding will allow you to have better experiences with partners. To do this, you can journal, learn from others, do tantra yoga, and more.
2. Own your sexuality – Whether you’re single or in a committed relationship, owning your sexuality is key. How you walk, interact with others, and how you treat yourself are all important in owning your sexuality. Regardless of your shape, size, features, or anything else, remember, you are a powerful woman who is beautiful and sexy and you have all the right to own it. Once you own your sexuality, you’ll find you’re much happier in the relationships you form with not only others but also yourself.
3. Ask for what you want – To become sexually empowered and liberated means not being afraid to ask for what you want. It can be what you want in a relationship or what you want in the bedroom, but whatever it is, make sure you’re vocal about your wants and needs. If you’re feeling dissatisfied and remain silent, you partner won’t know the necessary changes to make in order to create a more harmonious relationship. Don’t be submissive to what the others want because you’re afraid they might not like it. Put yourself first and let your voice be heard!
4. Prioritize your sexual health – Your sexual health affects not only your body, but also your mental health. Use protection and have the conversation about testing and previous partners before engaging in sexual activity. Although asking these questions may be uncomfortable, compromising your sexual health should not be a risk you’re willing to take. Get tested regularly and make sure to visit a health care professional if you have any concerns. Owning your sexuality will be much easier when you know you’re taking the proper measure to maintain your sexual health.
5. Your life, your timeline – Keep in mind, in life, we all have different timelines. Just because someone else in your group of friends may be getting married or having a child, does not mean you should feel any less empowered. If you’re choosing to wait until the right time to reproduce, contraception methods such as condoms and/or birth control are a great solution to prevent an unplanned pregnancy. This way, you can decide the time to have children when and if you want them. Nothing is more liberating than giving yourself the power to decide. That, too, is sexual empowerment!
6. You are the company you keep – The circle of people you surround yourself with can determine how you view yourself. Do your friends judge you when you share details of your sex life or when you talk about sex in general? Do they put you down or make you feel bad about yourself? If so, these are not the types of people you want to surround yourself with. Finding both men and women who support you and love you for you will help you become sexually empowered and comfortable in your own skin. Constant self-doubt from others isn’t good for anyone and is a breeding ground for low self-esteem and negative self-image.
7. Choose your partner(s) wisely – To be sexually empowered means not allowing yourself to be in relationships that degrade you, violate you, or make you feel uncomfortable. Only relationships that make you feel safe, respected, and appreciated allow you to grow in your sexual confidence. While a sense of security is a necessity to feel empowered, it’s crucial to remain independent in these relationships, both financially and emotionally, while also having healthy boundaries. This will ensure that if there is ever a shift in their demeanor, you have the strength and the means to walk away.
8. Heal yourself – Trauma, both in relationships and sex, can greatly affect how you see yourself and how you view intimacy. If you struggle with this, please seek help from a professional and learn how to heal from these negative experiences over time. Addressing your trauma and taking the time to understand it will help you, and you will one day be able to own your sexuality in a new way!
9. Know that pleasure is not just about sex – You’ve realized that pleasure isn’t confined to the bedroom. Your sensual energy is fueled by how connected you are to your senses. The simple act of wrapping yourself in a soft blanket, savoring a delicious meal, or feeling the breeze on your skin can bring you immense pleasure. You’ve given yourself the green light to soak up all the pleasure your everyday life has to offer.

Habits of a Sexually Empowered Woman

Now that you know that importance of sexual empowerment for women and how to become one, let’s take it one step further.

After you’ve taken the steps above and have started putting in the work, you may want to know whether or not you’ve made good progress. Well, here are a few habits of sexually empowered women. This is not an exhaustive list, but it’s a start to help you put them into practice.

1. She Embraces Open Communication: A sexually empowered woman isn’t shy about expressing her desires, needs, and boundaries. She knows that open and honest communication is the key to a satisfying and respectful sexual relationship.
2. She Prioritizes Self-Care: She understands that her sexual well-being is tied to her overall health. So, she takes care of her body, mind, and soul. This could be anything from regular exercise and healthy eating to meditation and self-reflection.
3. She Continually Educates Herself: She’s always eager to learn more about her body, sexual health, and sexuality in general. She stays informed and uses her knowledge to make empowered decisions.
4. She Practices Consent: She understands the importance of consent in all sexual activities. She respects her own boundaries and those of her partner.
5. She Celebrates Her Sexuality: She doesn’t hide or feel ashamed of her sexuality. Instead, she celebrates it as a natural and beautiful part of who she is.
6. She Nurtures Positive Relationships: She surrounds herself with people who respect and support her journey towards sexual empowerment. She values relationships that contribute positively to her self-esteem and sexual confidence.
7. She Trusts Her Instincts: She listens to her gut feelings and trusts her instincts when it comes to her sexual experiences and relationships. She knows when something feels right and when it doesn’t.

Over to you…

Ultimately, sexual empowerment is about becoming confident in all aspects of who you are as a sexual being. This includes understanding your sexual rights and the rights of others, possessing bodily autonomy, engaging in consensual sexual acts that are for your and your partner’s pleasure, and exploring different facets of your sexuality.

I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences. Have you struggled with owning your sexuality or finding supportive partners? What advice would you offer to other women to become sexually empowered? Please share your comments below. Let’s support each other in our journey towards sexual empowerment and liberation!

Embrace and love your body, it’s the most amazing thing you will ever own.

Unknown

Citation

Erchull, M. J., & Liss, M. (2014). The object of one’s desire: How perceived sexual empowerment through objectification is related to sexual outcomes. Sexuality & Culture, 18(4), 773-788.